I teach and practice “interdependence” – that united I am much stronger than seperated.   Some of the early AA speakers spoke of “the committee”, those voices in my head that robs serenity.  Space to stretch as our pets and animal relatives teach me, The “Tree of Life” is at the core of pagan earth based tribes.  The healing outside begins inside.  The 12 steps lead to the happy, joyous and free life that are the promises of recovery.  The single family unit has fed duality, all or nothing thinking and “consumerism”. – On the AA medallions given for years and stages of sobriety – the fundamentalists to the mystics who have learned the grail of silence.  Porn, drugs, the profane dwells within the all that is.  AA’s “to thine own self, be true” is the first wedding prior to any other outside marriage or hand-fasting

the two begins with the ascension from the “bondage of self”.   Embracing the both and yin/yang within.  My seven chakras go from my root chakra “iron John” to the Namaste of ascended mastery. From survival attitudes to thrival and gratitude.  My 48 years of freedom from alcohol only came from “one day at a time” and learning about “the non-progressive” Great Spirit.  the gifts of the “painstaking” shadow work – the happy, joyous and freedom from the “rule of gold”.  Do I have the courage to discern, the first lesson of the “handless maiden”.  I will go into the others later.  To know that I am a spiritual being in a human experience.

My 12 steps and the Red Road classes prepare us for the removal of barriers to playing with my whole heart once more.  I used to know this, but like any other dis-use, atrophy wins by default.

I began to see deeply into the emotions stirring within and to learn the art of feeling – the yin of my atrophied and co-creative side.  It helped to begin a lefting practice, as my atrophied side was what got “left out”.  I am a master of the art of drum making, the nearest thing yang can get to yin within me.  I have “birthed” thousands of drums with my own hands and heart.

I earned a masters degree in counseling and rehabilitation at Marshall University, one of the gifts of sobriety.  I first attained my Regents BA degree by gaining credits for my New York Institute of Finance, Registered Rep/stockbroker and commodities trader (Registered with Chicago board of Trade.  my fund raising experience and was blessed to have Dr. Wallace and other teachers who fed me what I was “ripe” to learn.  As I remember, I was addicted to perfectionism (one of the four universal addictions), and went through with a 4.0 Average.  I would drop courses I wasn’t doing well in and retake until I knew statistics, means, modes and mediums and both the behaviorists and the humanists.  I chose the one that the 12 steps of recovery from addictions, which is the work of Dr.s Fritz and Laura Perls, and attended workshops at the Cleveland Gestalt Institute.  The essense of gestalt is that my point of power is in this present moment, and the “how it works” involves no explanations or justifications, which are defense mechanisms.

My coyote was birthed by my New York experience.  The positive was seeing “Hair”, Jesus Christ Superstar, Man of La Mancha and other broadway musicals.  Being a Pinson, I loved to sing.  Like my father “Froggy” Pinson, I was a keeper of the songs, and upon meeting a fellow Scorpio woman while conducting a drum making workshop in England named Lynn Gosney. we brought the Celtic lodge to bear creek’s Heartspace.   My spirit guide is an eagle, which brougnt me to bear creek.  From my eagle view, I can see a greater vision than the mouse.   I see doctor assisted psychedelic healings, sweat lodges, organic gardens tended by the children as part of an earth school that is birthing.

My journey of the vision and birth of a drum business began with “fishing”.  To determine if their was a market.  My buddy Bob, Vicky and I came up with the name Cedar Mountain Drums.  I placed an in Shaman’s Drum Magazine,  for “instructions on how to build a shamans drum”, send $2.00.  The response affirmed my guidance to “follow the drum – follow my heart”.  I received the vision of Cedar Mountain Drums – I took the dream I had of the little girl, the hoop and the bear, and that led me to a series of miracles by the actions of others to bring the blessings of Martin High Bear, a Teton Sioux  medicine man, whose message was one of love and forgiveness, and releasing the facades I wore to cover the pain inside that I protected.  Another Native man did body work on me to retrieve that lost little  Patrick, that longed to play with his whole heart.  I was led out of the cave by a hawk, who made it safe for me to venture out.  (see Heartline Bear article)

I was later to meet and do Ceremony with Timothy , both a road man and a facilitator of plant spirit healing.  Mother Aya was my stern teacher.  I had asked for the truth, and was taken to the mirror revealing my true nature – a spiritual being in this body I had neglected, abused and fed fast foods to.  Our bodies are the perfect instruments – revealing our divine feminine nature.  The Goddess has long been a threat to the money changers,  and billionaires who live in the Titan realm of Samsara – those who can have anything they desire except happiness.  The rule of gold has replaced the golden rule and passes from the congregation to the Priest/Preachers who “spread the gospel” around the world.  This punishing God had to be put out to pasture and a more real and functional higher power called in with the sweetgrass – the inbreath.  I release the fear, I call in the love, or my loving nature – the gifts of the east – the birth of Osiris each day.  AA reminds me not to let the sun to set on my wrath”.  Before going on the hill, do the preparation (90% of ceremony is preparation).  Finishing is the  Omega.  Endings must happen in order to begin – the alpha and omega, or all that is.